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Doing the victory dance…on my own July 14, 2014

Posted by mareserinitatis in engineering, research, work.
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Over the past couple months, I’ve been putting insane amounts of time into a project in preparation for some field testing.  Once the widget was deployed, I was fully expecting to feel this great sense of accomplishment.  In particular, this was something that some people were skeptical would work, so getting working widgets out for use is a big deal.  Even some people who advocated for the widget were probably not expecting I’d be able to get it to work as they seemed surprised when I informed them I had finished.

One would think I’d be overjoyed.  I should be waiting for people to pat me on the back.  I should be intensely satisfied that I can tell the doubters, “Told you so!”  I should feel vindicated and totally kick-ass.

Except, I don’t really feel that way.  I just feel a huge sense of relief that the crunch in over and maybe I can actually sit and focus on finishing the never-ending dissertation (aren’t they all?) for a while.  I can disappear for a few days and not have constant distraction.  I don’t have to field questions and phone calls and emails even in my off time.

It’s not that I even want to go on a vacation or do something like that.  I’m okay with working…I just don’t want it to be around other people.

This, friends, is success for an introvert: being left alone for a while.  But I’m dancing on the inside.



An observation March 1, 2012

Posted by mareserinitatis in societal commentary.
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Abstracting about human nature tonight, and I thought this rather interesting.

My observation is that people who are successful often attribute that success almost entirely to their own efforts without acknowledging the role that luck and the assistance of others have played in their success or others’ success or lack thereof.  I tend to find people who do acknowledge the effects of chance or a champion as being pleasantly humble.

Those who are not successful often attribute this primarily to luck (or lack thereof) as well as the effects that others have on them while downplaying their own role in such issues.

It seems to me that the perception of your own role has a lot to do with one’s longterm success (by their own definition, not mine), and I don’t know why so few people seem to take into account all of the aspects that determine their fate.

Cap’n, I believe we have some cling-ons February 27, 2012

Posted by mareserinitatis in research.
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Recently, someone was promoting some of my work to hir colleagues.  I was very flattered until, near the end, when they shifted gears and started talking about another person and how their work relates to mine.

Except…it doesn’t.

I don’t think this person was trying to cut me down, but somehow it seemed like they were at least trying to hype up this other person, potentially attaching them to my success.  It didn’t feel all that great.

I’m trying to look at it this way: if this other person is doing similar work, they’ve obviously been less successful given what I’ve done has gotten a significant amount of press while their work has not.  Unfortunately, I’m not sure if the people to whom this information was being directed will know that given they aren’t in the field.  And that tends to bring me back to the question of why it is so important to promote this other person in the middle of my success.

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