Doing the victory dance…on my own July 14, 2014
Posted by mareserinitatis in engineering, research, work.Tags: introvert, stress, success, widget, work
1 comment so far
Over the past couple months, I’ve been putting insane amounts of time into a project in preparation for some field testing. Once the widget was deployed, I was fully expecting to feel this great sense of accomplishment. In particular, this was something that some people were skeptical would work, so getting working widgets out for use is a big deal. Even some people who advocated for the widget were probably not expecting I’d be able to get it to work as they seemed surprised when I informed them I had finished.
One would think I’d be overjoyed. I should be waiting for people to pat me on the back. I should be intensely satisfied that I can tell the doubters, “Told you so!” I should feel vindicated and totally kick-ass.
Except, I don’t really feel that way. I just feel a huge sense of relief that the crunch in over and maybe I can actually sit and focus on finishing the never-ending dissertation (aren’t they all?) for a while. I can disappear for a few days and not have constant distraction. I don’t have to field questions and phone calls and emails even in my off time.
It’s not that I even want to go on a vacation or do something like that. I’m okay with working…I just don’t want it to be around other people.
This, friends, is success for an introvert: being left alone for a while. But I’m dancing on the inside.
October sucks October 13, 2013
Posted by mareserinitatis in engineering, family, older son, personal, teaching, work.Tags: college, family, family/work balance, NSF, older son, sports, stress, work
1 comment so far
I really am starting to dread October. Being in the midst of it, I understand why.
October is when *everything* happens. There’s no way to handle it but to keep going until the sheer exhaustion kicks in. For me personally, I have NSF proposals due. I am deep in the throes of teaching and grading. I have reports due and conference papers to prepare. My kids have all their various sports and other activities in full swing, meaning that we have activities going on 3 or 4 nights per week.
This year is definitely worse than last year because I’m still recovering from my medical fiasco last month, complete with lots of fun follow-up tests, and still am not able to engage in complete stress relief on a regular basis (i.e. running). Further, the older son is going through the college application process, which is generally more time consuming than either of us really likes at this point. I am hoping that these factors won’t be present in Octobers to come.
Half-way there, though. Just a couple more weeks, and things will ease off. One of the sports that both boys are in will be done until spring, NSF proposals will be over, most of the major grading I have will be done…and there will be leftover Halloween candy. As long as someone saves me a peanut butter cup, I’ll be fine.
I also blog at Engineer Blogs, home away from home to some of the best engineering blogs.